WWE Wrestling News & Spoliers » Evan Bourne

WWE Monday Night RAW 2011.04.04 Results

tant — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 07:35:20 +0000

from Atlanta, Georgia and your announcers are Jerry ‘They Terk My Win’ Lawler and Jim ‘Just like riding a bike’ Ross. The show starts and would you like to play The Game? Triple H comes to the ring and he does his first GameFountain since losing last night to the Undertaker. Hunter says that this is the most tired and beat up he has been in his entire life. Last night, 71,000 fans in the Georgia Dome, he stood in the ring at Wrestlemania against the Undertaker and his undefeated streak. He says that he has never been a nervous guy, an emotional guy, a guy who gets rattled; but he stood in the ring last night with 71,000 fans and when that gong hit and he came down the ramp, Hunter says that he almost hyperventilated. Hunter says that he has wrestled Undertaker before, he wrestled him at Wrestlemania before but it has never been like that. The undefeated streak has become everything and Taker is willing to destroy himself to keep it intact. Hunter says that he hit Taker harder than any man in his life. He beat on Taker more than any man in his life and Taker kept coming. They both left everything in that ring last night. Apparently for him, it wasn’t good enough. Hunter says that you can call him whatever you want but no man has ever walked through his stuff like that. He says that it must be willpower because what Hunter saw being carried out of the arena in a stretcher is a man. A man who is willing to destroy himself to keep that streak intact. A lot of people are talking about how Taker was carted out and how he is just a man and will never be the same again. Hunter says that he will never be the same again. Some are saying that the Undertaker will not be back. Hunter says that if that is the case, he isn’t buying it, but he wants to say one thing. Hunter takes off his sunglasses and he says ‘thank you Deadman’. He gave him the fight of his life. Thank you. Hunter says that he doesn’t believe that Taker won’t be back after what happened last night. He knows that Taker will be back and Hunter says that he will be waiting. Jim Ross mentions that he never remembered seeing Undertaker being carted out. JR also mentions that there are rumors that Michael Cole is going to call Lawler out. Lawler says that he heard that rumor too and that is why he wore his gear.

t was not a dream, Jim Ross is still doing play by play. JR mentions that Steve Austin will be on tonight because Tough Enough debuts after Raw. JR asks Lawler about his Wrestlemania debut and how he felt about it. Lawler says that he was happy with his performance. The new Syracuse Orange interrupts Lawler and he says that despite overwhelming odds last night, history was made at Wrestlemania. Despite biased refereeing by Steve Austin, Team Cole emerged victorious. Cole says that he overcame every obstacle to defeat Jerry Lawler. When Wrestlemania, the world was not talking about the Rock or Taker’s undefeated streak. The world was talking about Michael Cole and how he stole the show. Cole points out that he is undefeated at Wrestlemania. With Shawn Michaels now in the WWE Hall of Fame, Cole says that he is Mr. Wrestlemania. Lawler tells Cole to shut his pie hole. He says that Cole didn’t beat anybody. A stupid computer beat him. Lawler says that he made Cole tap out and he was crying like a little girl. Lawler tells Cole that in his record book, he might have gone down as the winner. Cole will forever be known as a worthless jackass. Cole tells Lawler to get over it because he beat him. Even with Steve Austin, Lawler couldn’t win. He wants Lawler to admit that he is a better athlete and a better man. Cole has a proposition for Lawler and he suggests a rematch. Lawler accepts the rematch and suggests that it happen right now. Lawler and Cole walk to the ring but Cole tells Lawler that he isn’t talking about a Wrestlemania rematch. Cole says that he was talking about a rematch from last week’s Raw against Jack Swagger.

Jerry Lawler versus Jack Swagger

Winner: Jack Swagger

Did You Know that Wrestlemania 27 was the largest crowd for an entertainment show. We go to a Moments Ago Moment of Michael Cole attacking Jim Ross with his own barbecue sauce because JR was in his seat (but Cole is in his own cubicle. Cole is joined by Josh Mathews and Booker T (Devon . . . hit the selective mute button).

Randy Orton and Rey Mysterio versus CM Punk and Cody Rhodes in a Pairing Opponents from two matches at the Pay Per View . . . You mean it was yesterday? Match

Winners: Rey Mysterio and Randy Orton

Steve Austin is walking in the back and he sees Triple H. Austin tells Hunter that if it happens again, he will be there and he tells Hunter that he had a hell of a match. Austin continues to walk into commercial. We are back with a Sin Cara video package. In case you missed it, Undertaker is 19-0. Go to WWE.com to see their stories on the match. Glass breaks and Steve Austin makes his way to the ring because Tough Enough debuts in about 75 minutes. Cole continues to talk about last night’s win and people are probably wishing Austin had his cement truck with him. Austin gives a hell yeah. He says that Tough Enough premieres after Raw so he asks if people are ready for it, he wants a ‘Hell Yeah’. Austin brings out the contestants to see what they have. They finally get to the ring and Austin asks them how they are doing. He says that he has 14 men and women. They are going to put them through the basics Stone Cold Style. Austin talks about his trainers, Booker T, Bill DeMott, and Trish Stratus. Austin says that they are 14 fine human beings, but at the end, there will be only one and it will be Stone Cold’s choice. Austin says the he will let them introduce themselves. They introduce themselves and Austin tells them to do it short and sweet. Not all of them listen to Austin. Austin says that it takes a lot of commitment to make it in the square circle. Speaking of Tough Enough, The Miz comes out and Cole makes you wish he wasn’t wearing spandex. Miz tells Steve Austin that he is absolutely right. When he was on Tough Enough in 2004, people were telling him to go back to the Real World, but after last night, no one is telling him where to go. We see footage from last night’s match between John Cena and The Miz. Miz says that he suffered a concussion that would end most people’s careers, but he continued his match and went on to retain his WWE Title. Miz says that the 14 people in the ring can dream of being as successful as him. He main evented Wrestlemania and beat John Cena. He says that he is the most Must See Champion in WWE. He says that he is the new face of the WWE. Miz enters the ring and tells Buckwheat to move. Miz tells them to soak it in because this is the closest they are going to get to a WWE Championship. Miz looks at Austin and he asks Steve if he wants to hold his WWE Title belt too. Miz asks Austin if he has one more run. Miz asks Austin if he thinks he is ‘tough enough’. Miz asks Austin if they should clear the ring to see if he has one more match. Austin looks at Miz and then he tells everyone to clear the ring. Riley attacks Austin from behind and he punches Austin. Get your Stunner count down clock running because it is coming. Riley punches Austin but Austin opens a can of whoop ass on Riley. Riley punches Austin but Austin with a Thesz Press and he punches Riley and follows that with an elbow drop. Austin kicks Riley and the waiter gets Stunnered. Austin wants something to drink and he gets some beers. Austin gives the beers to the contestants. Austin walks to the crime scene and Austin decides to give Cole a shower.

Alberto Del Rio with Ricardo Rodriguez and Brodus Clay versus Evan Bourne

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

in case you missed Wrestlemania, we see the Georgia Dome. Did you see what happened during Wrestlemania week in Atlanta? Cole says that he is going to challenge Jerry Lawler in the Art competition. Vickie Guerrero comes out and she says that Snooki beat LayCool and it was their fault they lost, not Dolph’s. Dolph congratulates Morrison for his big Wrestlemania win, or should he be congratulating Snooki. Dolph makes a challenge to Morrison and Trish to come to the ring and do what they do best. That is not getting the job done.

Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero versus John Morrison and Trish Stratus

Winners: Trish Stratus and John Morrison

Sheamus versus Daniel Bryan in the This Couldn’t Have Made it onto the PPV United States Title Match

Winner: Sheamus

Did You Know that Wrestlemania trended well without any sponsoring. It is time for the confrontation based on what we saw at the end of Wrestlemania. Wait, that was Rock and Miz. Here is the Rock and John Cena confrontation. Cena says that there are a lot of people upset about a certain someone’s actions at Wrestlemania. Cena says that he would have been naïve if he didn’t expect something because that certain someone was going to Atlanta to kick some candy ass so he knew he wasn’t talking about Zack Ryder. John says that he was surprised that the certain someone got involved in the finish of the match. However, if that person didn’t get involved, it would have been a draw and that would have sucked donkeys. Cena congratulates Miz and says that he was able to walk into Wrestlemania as Champion and walk out as Champion. Cena says that Miz is still the most annoying person on the face of the Earth, but he says that after Miz’s showing tonight, he has earned all of our respect. Now it is time to talk about the certain someone. Cena says that after hearing Rock speak for so long, he hasn’t earned Rock’s respect. It is obvious that Rock doesn’t like him. That certain someone is here tonight. Cena says that this certain someone was supposed to be the guest host but he got involved in business. HIS business. That means that they have some business to settle right now. Rock’s music plays and he is not wearing his warm up jacket tonight. Rock tells Cena that he wants to be direct with him. He asks him what did he think was going to happen. He knows that payback was coming. If you poke a shark in the eye, you get swallowed whole. Has the Rock talked trash about Cena? You bet he has. He does it better than anybody. It is what the people love. Rock tells Cena that he is wrong about respect. Rock says that he respects Cena (and the fans boo). Rock says that just because he has been gone, he doesn’t know what Cena has done. He says that he knows that Cena lives and breathes the WWE. He knows that it is because of that drive, he has become one of the greatest WWE Superstars and Champions of all time. It doesn’t change the fact that the Rock just doesn’t like Cena. Rock tells Cena to look at each other. They are complete opposites. They look different, they talk different, they fight different, but they are very similar. It is because whatever they do, they want to do it the absolute best, better than anyone . . . period. Rock says that he shops at department stores while Rock shops at Baby Gap. Cena says that he appreciates fashion tips from the Tooth Fairy. Cena reminds Rock that he is the People’s Champ so he tells Rock to listen to the people. Cena says that people are standing not to see them talk, but to see . . . a match. Not just a match, but a match where generations collide. Only in the WWE would you see Muhammad Ali and Mike Tyson in their prime. Only in the WWE would you see Michael Jordan versus Lebron James. It is obvious that it should be John Cena versus The Rock. Cena wants to know if Rock wants to talk about it or Bring It. Cena takes off his shirt and Rock stands there. Rock tells Cena he has no idea what he just asked for. He says that Cena asks him to bring it and the Rock will bring it. Rock says that they make history and do something that has never been done before. They do the biggest match up of all time. They do it on the grandest scale of all time. They do it at Wrestlemania 28. Rock says not in any matchup. It will be the People’s Champion with Team Bring It and the Millions . . . and Millions of his fans. It will be the main event of the People’s Wrestlemania. Rock asks Cena if he can smell what he is cooking. Rock puts his hand out and Cena shakes it. The Corre comes to the ring and they circle Rock and Cena. The Corre go after Cena and Rock with Gabriel and Barrett going after Rock while Slater and Jackson go after Cena. Rock punches Barrett and Cena with the Blue Thunder Bomb to Slater. Cena sets for the Five Knuckle Shuffle and he hits it. Now it is time for the Rock to show what he can do. Rock with a spinebuster to Barrett and it is time for the People’s Elbow. Cena gives Slater an Attitude Adjustment and Cena’s music plays. The music stops when Rock hits a Rock Bottom on Barrett. They shake hands again.

Alberto Del Rio with Ricardo Rodriguez and Brodus Clay vs Evan Bourne raw 2011.04.04

tant — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 07:31:14 +0000

Del Rio with a kick to Bourne and then he backs Evan into the turnbuckles. Del Rio kicks and chokes Bourne in the corner. Bourne with a spinning heel kick followed by kicks to the leg. Bourne runs into a boot from Del Rio. Del Rio with a kick to the chest and Bourne goes to the floor. Del Rio sends Bourne into the ringside barrier. Del Rio sends Bourne back into the ring and he gets a near fall. Del Rio with a chin lock on Bourne with his knee in Bourne’s back. Bourne with a kick but Del Rio with a knee. Bourne with a rollup for a near fall followed by more kicks. Bourne with a leaping knee for a near fall. Del Rio with a kick but Bourne escapes a suplex attempt. Bourne with a kick when Del Rio charges and then Bourne goes up top and Bourne takes too long. This allows Del Rio to hit the step up enzuigiri and he puts Bourne in the cross arm breaker and Bourne taps out.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio

WWE Monday Night RAW 2011.03.21 Results

tant — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 07:24:00 +0000

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and your announcers are Michael ‘Is Matt Cooke available to be my bodyguard tonight’ Cole, Jerry ‘Next time close up the air holes on Cole’s Skinner Box’ Lawler, and Josh ‘I never had my Wrestlemania match, so do I have to challenge Todd Grisham’ Mathews.

They announce ‘Good Ole JR’ but it is Michael Cole in a fat suit with a neck brace on his ankle while he limps to the ring with a bottle of JR’s Barbecue Sauce. Josh cannot believe that Cole is doing this while Lawler is silent. Security keeps Lawler away from Cole until he enters the Cone of Silence, that is still on the blink from its days at Control.

The fans chant for Lawler while Cole sticks his tongue out at Lawler.

Now it is time for the people who wrestle for a living to come to the ring and Triple H walks to the ring to unleash the GameFountain before he addresses Undertaker.

Hunter says that he has been in the business almost twenty years and it is a long time to stand in the ring and walk out to look at the fans. He wonders if this is the last time that he will work in this building. In two weeks, it will be the defining moment of his career. It is the defining moment of the Undertaker’s career. He says that he hears everybody talking and he sees the signs. The whole world is talking about this match. Two icons clashing like never before. Undertaker/Triple H, no holds barred.

Hunter says that he has no idea what this match will take out of him or out of the Undertaker. Neither man will ever be the same and he can assure us of that. It is the biggest match that he has ever been in during his life. The streak of eighteen years is bigger than any championship or even all of the championships that he has held combined. Ending that streak will be a career defining moment.

Before they go to the ring and tear each other apart and put each other through hell. He tells the Dead Man to come to Raw next week and stand in the ring. He wants to look the Undertaker in the eye and stand face to face, man to man so he can tell Taker what is going to happen at Wrestlemania. He wants to tell Undertaker to his face that he is going to lose. Hunter says that he will end the streak.

When the streak dies, so does the Undertaker. Hunter says that if cannot do it, he will die trying. Hunter says that he wants that one last opportunity to stand face to face. Just like Taker’s music says: Ain’t no grave that can hold this body down. When he ends the streak, that’s it. It’s done.

He tells Undertaker that at Wrestlemania, he goes 18-1. At Wrestlemania, he will rest in peace.

Ted DiBiase comes out and he has something to say to Hunter. One year ago, he was one of the rising superstars of WWE. He competed in his first Wrestlemania match against Randy Orton. Now he is just an afterthought. Ted says that he won’t be an afterthought any more. Ted suggests that if he takes out the Cerebral Assassin two weeks before Wrestlemania, the people will have no choice but to take notice of Ted DiBiase.

Hunter hits Ted as he enters the ring and then Hunter goes to the floor and he punches Ted. Ted gets in a series of punches but Hunter with a knee and then he sends Ted into the ring steps. Hunter Irish whips Ted into the ring steps and then he slams Ted’s head into the ring steps. Hunter sends Ted into the ringside barrier. Hunter picks up a chair and he hits Ted in the midsection and back with it. Hunter continues to hit Ted with the chair. Hunter rearranges the announce table. Hunter picks Ted up and goes onto the table for a Pedigree through the table. Hunter looks at the Wrestlemania sign.

We will hear from John Cena via satellite later tonight.

Miz will be re-writing Miz-tory tonight.

Sheamus versus Evan Bourne

Winner: Sheamus

Wrestlemania Rewind Match tonight and the match tonight is from Wrestlemania 22 with Randy Orton facing Rey Mysterio (Kurt Angle will not be there).

WWE Rewind: Randy Orton finishing off Nexus last week.

Randy Orton leaves his bus and Scott Stanford intercepts him. He wants to know what it is like to tour the country in his bus. Orton says that it gives him privacy and a place to think. He says that it is a home away from home. Orton says that he witnessed the birth of the New Nexus and he enjoys watching the footage when he systematically ended it, one punt at a time. Orton says that Punk says that he is sick and twisted, but Punk has no idea what sick and twisted really is.

Maryse versus Eve Torres in a Non Title Match

Winner: Eve Torres

Did You Know that John Cena does a lot for Make A Wish.

The Corre have made their way to Raw because the Tag Champs are in action. We go to footage from Smackdown when Big Show and Kane faced Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater.

Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater with Wade Barrett and Ezekiel Jackson versus Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov with Tamina

Winners: Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel

Big Show’s music plays and it is combined with Kane’s as they come to the ring.

Corre stops beating up Santino and Vladimir. Kane sends Gabriel into the ringside barrier and then Kane works over Barrett while Show punches Slater. Show kicks Jackson while Kane deals with Barrett. Santino checks on Kozlov while Kane and Show give Jackson a double choke slam.

We have an alliance of four people.

We see John Cena getting ready at home ‘via satellite’.

if you can wait a week, The Rock will be on Raw.

We go to footage from last week when the MizRock appeared after John Cena defeated Alberto Del Rio by disqualification and his systematic destruction of his challenger at Wrestlemania.

John Cena is home and Josh asks John what he is going to do next week. It will be epic. It won’t be time to tell jokes or eat cereal. He will be face to face with the Rock. If there is a problem, the problem gets settled. Jerry asks John if the attention that he has paid to the Rock has allowed him to underestimate the Miz. Cena says that is why Miz has been able to do what he has to do. Cena says that if anyone needs proof, they only have to see him at home. It is proof that Miz deserves to be champion and he might be able to change the face of WWE.

Cena says that last week was a good trick and he expects this week’s to be the same. He hopes that Miz rewrites history tonight because at Wrestlemania, he will make history.

Michael Cole says that Cena and Rock have a lot in common. They are via satellite, but Michael Cole says that he is live. Cole tells Lawler that he has another world exclusive when we come back.

Michael Cole and Jack Swagger are doing laps in the ring. Swagger goes to the apron and then he stands in front of Lawler.

Michael wants to introduce the man who will train him in the main event against Jerry Lawler. He is talking about Jack Swagger. Last week, we had a world wide exclusive when he brought out Jerry’s biological child to talk about what kind of a gutless fraud Jerry Lawler is. Cole says that he was so touched by the emotional and heartwarming reunion after all of those years. We go to the video tape.

Cole gets a good laugh out of what we just saw. Cole says that Brian Christopher was so appreciative to get a chance to come out to talk last week that he sent Cole a gift. Cole shows us the Lawler family photo album. In order to see what a person is all about, you need to see how they were raised.

It is time to take a look Jerry’s father. Cole adds his own captions for the photos.

Cole says that he went to Memphis to talk to some people. Cole says that Lawler and his dad were gutless cowards and bullies. The self aggrandizing braggart until someone steps up to them and puts them in their place. Cole says that he is going to do that to Lawler.

Cole says that Jerry, his mother, his father, and his son have one thing in common. The family is nothing but a bunch of losers.

Lawler has had enough but when he gets up from the announce table. Swagger punches Lawler. Lawler punches back and then he drops Swagger on the announce table. Lawler chases Cole out of the ring and then Swagger hits Lawler with a clothesline. Swagger puts Lawler’s face against the glass while Cole insults Lawler. Swagger puts Lawler in the ankle lock. Cole leaves the peep show booth and Cole applies the ankle lock while Swagger has his knee on Lawler’s head.

Michael Cole apologizes for letting his emotions get the best of him. Cole says that Lawler has been pushing his buttons and he says that he snapped. Cole sincerely apologizes for what happened.

It is time to look at the publicity that Snooki got for WWE and let’s go to the video tape.

Dolph Ziggler with Michelle McCool, Vickie Guerrero, and Layla versus John Morrison with Trish Stratus in a Taste of what you are going to get at Wrestlemania Match

Winners: Vickie Guerrero, Michelle McCool, Layla, and Dolph Ziggler

Did You Know that WWE’s Facebook is growing.

We have another Sin Cara video package.

Cole talks about what happened at the start of the show. Then we leave the glass curtain of Cole’s booth for Josh Mathews.

John Cena says that when Taker came back, it was like there will be a Wrestlemania. Show says that when Hunter interrupted Taker, he said this is getting good. There is confidence and there is cocky. There is also insanity. Arn Anderson says that all of those barriers were crossed when Hunter came out. Orton says that there were no words. Show and Steamboat also talk about how nothing was said during their first stare down.

Jerry Lawler says that he never saw anything like that in his forty years in wrestling. Hunter had to make a statement and that is what happened. John Morrison says that Triple H is trying to solidify himself as the icon and the legend. Jim Ross says that Hunter has done everything in WWE except one thing. Steve Austin points out that Triple H is putting everything on the line for this match and he has to win this match. Lawler says that Hunter has to accomplish this. Booker says that Hunter is challenging Taker because of one word . . . the streak. Booker points out that for eighteen years, it has been his burial ground. Lawler says that this is what Taker is. Arn says that it is like winning eighteen Super Bowls in a row. Harley Race says that luck played a role in the beginning, but luck runs out after eighteen years.

Big Show says that there is no one better than the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Jim Ross says that he doesn’t know if Taker’s career revolves around anything more than that one day. Arn Anderson says that Taker owns Wrestlemania. Shawn Michaels says that nothing lasts forever. The last two years, he was close to ending it. The Undertaker is hanging on by a thread. In a match where anything goes, Cena thinks that Hunter has a good chance to end the streak. Jim Ross says that Hunter’s mindset is what sets him apart from the other people who have challenged Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Cena says that he is calculating and focused. Ross also points out Hunter’s record in No Holds Barred matches. Arn Anderson says that he does not think that there is a person walking upright who will end the Undertaker’s streak.

Orton says that he knows what it is like to face Taker at Mania. Show says that he has never been pushed to the limit as much as when he faced the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Chris Jericho says that they are going to leave something in the ring that they will never get back. John Morrison says that they are two legends. Steve Austin says that both guys are going to put everything into this match. Steamboat says that everything they have done in the past is minimal compared to what is going to happen at Wrestlemania. Shawn says that to say that it will have impact is an understatement. Dusty Rhodes says that he believes that this will be the final chapter for one of them. Jim Ross says that only one person is going to be the guy who can say that they were the guy to beat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania.

Randy Orton says that he will be watching this match. This is the Super Bowl. This is Wrestlemania.

Randy Orton walks to the ring and we see the MASH unit of Nexus that Orton took care of.

Randy Orton versus Rey Mysterio in a 2/3 of the Wrestlemania 22 Match Wrestlemania Rewind Match

No Results

Triple H and Undertaker will meet face to face on Raw next week. The Rock will also be on Raw.

There is a red carpet in the ring and Alex Riley is back on Miz’s payroll. He says that he was fired three weeks ago as the Miz’s apprentice. Riley says that he was rehired as the vice president of corporate communication. Riley introduces The Miz.

Miz says that in the 1970s, people would travel great distances to gather so they could say that they saw Muhammad Ali box in person. In the 1980s, people would pay big money to see an in his prime Michael Jordan play basketball. Now these people are blessed with the honor of seeing him.

Miz says that when he first started, people didn’t take him seriously. People said that he was annoying. Now look at how far we have come. Now John Cena, like the Rock and everyone else hang on every single word that he says.

Last week, he imitated the Rock and he says that it was good and he got everyone. It is ironic because there have been a lot of wannabe Rock clones, the one who imitated him correctly and amazingly is someone who is one of a kind. An original. Miz says that he has rewritten history. Miz says that he has more charisma than Shawn Michaels. More physically imposing that Andre The Giant. More intelligent than The Rock and John Cena combined. Miz says that he is the greatest WWE Champion in history.

In the process, he has become greater than the WWE Universe and everyone in it. Miz says that he has flipped the WWE since day one. Miz says that he is going to reveal what symbolizes and celebrates the iconic WWE logo. Miz says that he has flipped it in the form of an ‘M’. Miz says that ‘M’ stands for Miz.

The time has now come. Miz says that it is time to rewrite Miz-tory. We have a drum roll as the curtain is lifted and we see the new WWE title belt with the ‘W’ flipped.

Miz holds the belt over his head and then he puts the belt around his waist with help from his gofer. Miz says that this is what the belt will look like from now on. It will not spin like a toy. It will be the most coveted title in the world. Miz says that he will not be a multi-time champion because he does not plan on losing this title because he’s the Miz . . . and he’s . . .

AWESOME!

John Cena appears ‘via satellite’ and he says that was moving and epic. He hasn’t seen anything that dramatic since the season finale of Flip that House. Cena gets the reason why Miz flipped the logo over. Cena says that the WWE Universe knows that he is not invincible. The WWE Universe will learn that you don’t make him angry. Cena says that in thirteen days, he will make history.

People move the furniture behind him and it turns out that John is outside the Penguins locker room in the arena. Cena says WWE has been his home for nine years and they are in the middle of his living room and he is going to take out the trash.

Miz and Riley get ready for Cena to attack them by taking off their ties.

Cena’s music plays and he comes out. Miz throws the table at Cena but he moves. Cena fights off Miz and Riley and then Riley tries to choke Cena but Cena gets free. Cena throws Riley to the floor and then Cena goes after Miz but Miz is on the floor. Riley returns to the ring and that is mistake number one. Cena puts Riley in the STF and Riley is tapping. A referee comes to the ring to tell Riley that it doesn’t matter if he taps and he also tries to get Cena to release the hold.

Miz returns into the arena and Cena lets go of the hold. Cena and Miz stare each other down from a distance and then Cena puts Riley back in the STF. Miz cannot believe what is going on with Riley, but he is smart enough not to get to the ring. More referees come to the ring to try to get Cena off Riley and eventually Cena lets go.

Sheamus vs Evan Bourne raw 2011.03.21 Results

tant — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 07:11:20 +0000

They lock up and Sheamus sends Bourne to the mat. Bourne with kicks but Sheamus sends Bourne into the turnbuckles and hits a short arm clothesline. Sheamus with a kick and knees to the head as Bourne goes to the apron. Sheamus with forearms across the chest while he has Bourne in the ropes. Sheamus with an Irish whip but he misses a charge into the corner. Bourne with a spinning heel kick and then he goes to the apron.

Bourne goes up top but Sheamus moves out of the way on the shooting star press. Sheamus with a boot to the head for the three count.

Winner: Sheamus

After the match, Sheamus gets on the mic and tells us that he is the new champion of the United States of America.

Daniel Bryan comes out to the ring. Bryan says that one of the great things about this country is that everyone gets an opportunity. As a former United States Champion, Bryan wants to invoke his rematch clause and get that match at Wrestlemania.

Sheamus tosses the belt to Bryan and breaking rule #420, he catches the belt. Bryan falls victim to a pump kick.

WWE Monday Night RAW 2011.02.28 Results

tant — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 08:17:05 +0000

live from Buffalo, New York and your announcers are Josh ‘I wrote James Franco’s material at the Oscars’ Mathews and Jerry ‘I’m WINNING’ Lawler.

With Wrestlemania a little more than a month away, we start off with the man who made his triumphant return last week on Raw. That man is Triple H and he has his WWWater Bottle for the most electrifying expectoration in Sports Entertainment.

We have the graphic for the Undertaker versus Triple H match at Wrestlemania (ten years in the making).

Hunter takes a moment to soak in the applause. He says that it is good to see everyone too. He says that they say the true test of a man’s mettle is the test of time. He says that he has done everything there is to do in the WWE. Every accolade, every championship. He defined the Elimination Chamber and Hell in a Cell. He is a thirteen time WWE Champion. He mentions that he started Degeneration X with Shawn Michaels. With Ric Flair, he started Evolution. He says that he has been hated and he has been loved. He has defeated Icons, legends, immortals. He has done it all in his sixteen years. He says that it seems like yesterday. He has seen them all come and go. Hunter says that he has outlasted them all. . .

Except for one. The Deadman. The Phenom. The Undertaker.

Hunter says that he heard Taker referred to as the ‘Last Outlaw’. There are two. He says that they are more alike than Taker would think. Hunter says that there are no more challenges left in the locker room. There are no big tests in front of them. There is only one thing that stands before them. For Taker, it is the streak and he goes year to year. It is what keeps Taker going. When Taker looks around the locker room, Hunter is the only true challenge he has left.

Hunter says that the only true challenge he has is ending the streak.

He says that is the only thing standing between them. It will happen at Wrestlemania 27. The biggest event in history. Hunter looks at the sign and he tells the Deadman that they will define an era. The iconic, immortal, legendary, the last two will meet. On that night, nothing else will matter. There can be only one.

Hunter tells Taker that when the streak dies, Taker dies. Hunter says that he only has one thing left and it is the streak. Hunter says that he will die trying to end the streak.

Hunter poses on the turnbuckles, but he is stopped by the man who put Hunter on the shelf for almost a year.

Sheamus comes to the ring. Hunter kicks Sheamus as he enters the ring. Hunter throws Sheamus over the top rope to the floor and then he sends Sheamus into the ringside barrier. Hunter punches Sheamus and then he sends Sheamus into the ring post. Hunter clotheslines Sheamus into the ring announcer/ring bell cubicle. Hunter puts Sheamus on the announce table and rearranges it. Hunter gets Sheamus set for the Pedigree and after pointing at the Wrestlemania sign one more time, Hunter hits the Pedigree and the table collapses like Sheamus’s status.

Josh and Jerry talk about what we are going to see later on the show as they stand by the fallen Sheamus.

Shawn Michaels and Michael Cole will be talking later tonight.

Speaking of talking, we will go to the Rock House for his response to John Cena.

Moments Ago Moment of Sheamus confronting Triple H, if by ‘confront’ you mean get decimated by Triple H including a Pedigree through the announce table.

We see Sheamus getting helped up by a gaggle of referees and he is still lucky to gain his balance.

The General Messenger makes his presence known and Jerry Lawler is going to read what has to be said.

Jerry says that even though Sheamus was attacked by Triple H, it isn’t his problem so he has to have his match against Evan Bourne.

Evan Bourne versus Sheamus

Winner: Evan Bourne

Slam of the Week: Michael Cole being challenged by Jerry Lawler last week on Raw for a match at Wrestlemania.

Michael Cole is in the ring and he wants everyone’s attention. Cole tells Lawler that he wants to do it man to man and face to face. He wants to do this eye to eye. He tells Jerry to get off his fat antiquated butt right now.

Jerry gets up from the new announce table and Cole reminds Jerry that he cannot strike him or he will be fired.

Cole says that he looked at the edict from the General Manager. If Lawler strikes Cole, he is fired. Cole asks Lawler if he thought he was intimidated last week. Did Lawler think that he was going to cower from his Wrestlemania Challenge. There is no one on this Earth with more guts than him.

Cole says that he never backs down from a fight. Cole says that his answer to Lawler’s challenge is no. That is unless Lawler accepts two conditions. The first condition is that his trainer can be in his corner at Wrestlemania. The second condition is that he gets to choose the special guest referee for the match.

Jerry takes the mic and he tells Cole Sore that he doesn’t care if Cole has the Dark Knight, King Kong, Saba Simba, and Superman with him because the answer is that he is on.

Cole says that they have their match and he is a little too happy. Cole decides to introduce his trainer. He says that he is a former World Champion, Jack Swagger. Swagger gets in Lawler’s face and Cole pushes Lawler but Cole can’t get fired for touching Lawler.

Cole slaps Lawler and Lawler goes after Cole, but Swagger stops Lawler and he puts Lawler in the ankle lock.

Randall Keith Orton walking in the back as only Randall can.

We are back and Did You Know that WWE’s Facebook page gets a lot of new members every day.

Steve Austin will be on Raw next week.

Michael Cole joins Josh Mathews at the announce table and I wish I was with Sheamus because he probably can’t hear this. Cole wants to see highlights of the ankle lock that we just saw.

Randy Orton comes to the ring and he has something to say, probably to CM Punk and Nexus.

Orton tells Punk that he was right about something last week. Two and a half years ago when he kicked Punk in the skull, he made the biggest mistake of his career. The mistake was that he should have kicked Punk harder. He says that Punk can talk about faith but it won’t protect him. Orton says that he will kick Punk so hard that it makes his neck snap. He will crush Punk’s spine and make him a permanent resident of a rehabilitation facility where his goal will be to walk again. Punk will eat from a straw and everything will be a haze. The only thing that Punk will have left is the faith that deserted him.

CM Punk comes out with three members of Nexus since Husky Harris is still injured.

Punk calls Orton an arrogant but predictable hypocrite. Punk says that Orton’s ego has put him here. Even though Orton will try to put him in a rehab facility, Punk says that he is going to put Orton in the ground.

The General Messenger appears from his dingy dingy world and Cole gives Josh the honors. Since there is only one way for Punk and Orton to settle things and that is in a match at Wrestlemania. Randy Orton will face members of the Nexus leading to Mania. If they win, they will be allowed in Punk’s corner. If Orton beats them, they will not be allowed at Wrestlemania. The Messenger says that if Punk or Nexus interfere in any way, Nexus will be disbanded.

Randy Orton versus Michael McGillicutty

Winner: Randy Orton

CM Punk stands on the stage while Orton stares around the ring and he sees Michael in a position that his tag team partner was in a few weeks ago. Is Orton thinking of going for a field goal in the city made famous by a missed field goal?

Punk tells Orton to stop, but does he mean it. Punk uses the ‘three name’ taunt to stop him so he does not kick Michael in the skull.

Orton shows that he is not good with instructions and he is good from 45. Orton goes through the crowd while Punk, Ryan, and Otunga fail to stop him before Orton climbs to the concourse.

We have footage from the contract signing of Sin Cara in Mexico last week.

The Miz and Alex Riley are walking in the back and Michael Cole keeps talking about how great he thinks Miz is.

Slam of the Week: Miz turning on his tag team partner and fellow champion John Cena last week.

It is time for Michael Cole to mark out without uttering the two words because The Miz is coming to the ring and he is joined by Alex ‘Mongo’ Riley.

Miz says that the Rock is going to respond to John Cena tonight. Miz says that he called out the Rock last week and he isn’t responding to him. Miz says that we know why. That is because Rock knows that Miz is right. This is no longer the Rock’s show. Rock was the biggest star in the WWE. Then it was John Cena. John Cena’s days are numbered and Rock’s are over and they have been for some time. Miz says that we have to realize that he is the biggest star in the WWE. Miz says that he is the reason why we are here tonight. He says that he is the one talk shows want. He is the face of this company. Miz says that he is the most must see WWE Champion in its history.

Miz asks if there is a trend. It is all about him. It has always been about him and it will always be about him. Miz says that people asked him about becoming a tag champion with John Cena. Miz says that he wants the record to show that he won the tag titles, but John Cena lost them. Miz says that is exactly what he wanted to happen. Miz says that he is in the driver’s seat on this show. When John Cena is worrying about the Rock and his raps, Cena should be worried about one person, the WWE Champion.

Miz says that if the Rock and Cena want to go back and forth and back and forth, so be it. Miz says that he will beat John Cena at Wrestlemania and then he will beat the Rock. Miz repeats himself and then says that no one will ever mention them again. They will only talk about the Miz as the greatest superstar of all time.

Alex Riley gets on the mic and he tells everyone to get on their feet and show respect to the man who will main event Wrestlemania in 34 days.

That man’s music plays and John Cena comes to the ring.

Cena says that he has some important news. Cena says that he is upset because he cannot hear another word that he has to say. Cena says that the people shouldn’t have to put up with this. Cena says that the Miz is not well. Cena says that he has a Doctor’s Note and it says that Miz has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Miz is obsessed with everything. He is obsessed with being awesome, but the report says that he is average. Miz says that he is ‘must see’ but you need a microscope to see it. Miz has hundreds of cats, thousands of pairs of blue Dockers, he saves his dogs poop bags, and pees in milk jugs.

That is only the half of it. Cena says that he cannot believe that it has rubbed off on Riley because he locks himself in the closet and eats toilet paper.

Riley says that he realized why people nicknamed toilet bowls ‘johns’ because Cena is full of crap.

Cena asks Miz why people don’t take him seriously as a champ. Cena says that was awful. He tells Miz to look at Riley. He looks like a fish trying to suck up air while it dies. Cena tells Miz that he needs to do this by himself. Does Miz want to look back at his legacy and realize that he shared it with another man. Cena says that if Miz wants to be ‘must see’, he should fire Alex Riley right now so Wrestlemania can be The Miz versus John Cena.

Miz asks Cena if he is scared of Riley or is Cena trying to play mind games? Miz says that he is mentoring the next generation of WWE Superstars. He is sharing his brilliance with Riley instead of selling merchandise.

Cena suggests that Miz should announce that him and Riley are co-champions and then they are going to move in together. He says that if Miz is teaching Riley how to be a loser, he will teach him how to be a man. Cena wants a match with Alex Riley and if he wins, Riley no longer works for the Miz.

Miz says something to Riley and Miz accepts on one condition. Miz says that he will not interfere. If Riley wins, he wants Cena to publicly admit that Miz is the greatest superstar of all time because he is the Miz and he is . . .

AWESOME!!

Miz says that he has been fired, has had water thrown on him, and has been called everything and he says that he will do it if Riley can win.

We get the noise that made WWE fans furious and Cole assumes the position. And he quotes. No offense to Miz or his word, but to insure that there is no outside interference, Alex Riley versus the Miz will take place inside a steel cage. The only way to win the match is to escape the cage.

Shawn Michaels will talk about Undertaker versus Triple H.

Eve Torres joins Cole and Mathews at the announce table for

Divas Battle Royal

Winner: Nikki Bella

it is time to see the Rock’s response to John Cena’s response to him.

We see what John Cena said last week to Rock.

Cole says that John Cena was right with what he said last week. Josh says that we are going to Rock’s home in Los Angeles.

Rock has his Cena hat on and he has a medallion. Rock mocks Cena and he says that the Rock has totally gone soft so he has to take this crap off.

FINALLY . . . The Rock has come back . . . to Monday Night Raw. Rock says that he is the champion of the people. He says that he is electrifying everyone in the HSBC Arena. FINALLY . . . the Rock has come back . . . to Buffalo. It is that electricity that is in the air and you can cut it with a night. It makes every woman with a beating heart to stop in her tracks and say that they want a piece of the Rock. It makes every man with an ounce of testosterone and say that they want to kick some candy asses. Rock says that they have the attention of John Cena.

He wants to get this straight. He makes his historic return to Raw and electrify the world. He talked from the heart to the people and he said what he thought about John Cena. He addressed John like a man, but Cena responds with a rap to him.

Rock says that Cena addressed him in the form of rap. Of course Cena did. That is how the guy in the purple shirt responds with the jean shorts and the chains. Hustle, Loyalty, and Respect. Rock says that he thought it was real funny. Rock wants to remind Cena and the world how this thing started. It started with John Cena running his mouth about the Rock. He called the Rock a liar when he said that he loved the WWE. He says that Cena said that he didn’t want the Rock jerking the fans by saying that he loved the WWE when he wasn’t coming back. Rock says that Cena insulted him and his family. Rock says that his love for the WWE is endless. He was born in the WWE. His blood is the WWE. Rock says that his grandfather is High Chief Peter Maivia. His father is Rocky Johnson. They are Hall of Famers who he inducted. Rock points out that he is standing in front of the title belts that he won. Rock says that he achieved everything he could in the WWE and he wanted more. If he made it in Hollywood outside of the WWE. It means that he opened his door for the WWE and the WWE locker room. He opened the door for John Cena. He paved the way for him. Rock says that John Cena publicly insulted and knocked the People’s Champion.

Rock says that there are consequences for running your mouth. Cena made an open plea for him to bring it. No one brings it like the Rock. Rock says that Cena has opened a door and on the other side is the Jabroni beating, pie eating, trailblazing, eyebrow raising, Cena you say what you want and you reap what you sow, but the Rock will kick your monkey ass from here to Buffalo.

The Rock is hosting Wrestlemania, but he will be addressing John Cena sooner than he thinks. The Rock electrifies all over the world. His spirit is everywhere. It is in that spirit that the People’s Champ can raise his fingers and electrify it just like ‘that’ (and the lights go out). Rock says that they will feel the electricity and meets Cena face to face, he is never alone. The Rock is with the Millions . . . and Millions of the Rock’s people bringing it to John Cena and the world. Rock says that he ain’t no rapper, but neither is Cena. He tells Cena to shut his mouth and listen to him. Rock says that he is back to scratch a major itch. He tells Cena to enjoy his Fruity Pebbles, you Yabba Dabba Bitch. The Rock will address Cena like a man. In these eyes you will be lookin’ and at that moment you will smell what the Rock is cookin’.

Did You Know that Smackdown was the most watched show on SyFy in three years.

It is time for Shawn Michaels to talk about the Taker/Triple H match. He says that when he first heard about the match, he was happy to hear that Taker might finally get his. Triple H might end the streak. You are happy and sad because you were unable to break the streak. Shawn mentions his history with both men. When you are in the ring with the Undertaker, you are at war with a legacy, not a man. Shawn says that is a huge mountain to climb. Being inside the ring with Triple H, there is a part of him that is vicious. Every time that he has been in the ring with Hunter, he has never seen any compassion in his eyes and they are friends. If there is anybody who can beat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania it is Hunter. There is a history inside every man. Shawn says that the easy answer for who he is rooting for is Triple H because he is his buddy. Shawn says that he does not know how he will react if Hunter wins.

Miz attacks Daniel Bryan and sends him into the ringside barrier. Miz with a boot to Bryan’s head. Miz kicks Bryan and chokes him. Miz kicks Bryan in the head one more time. Miz hits Bryan with the Skull Crushing Finale on the floor. Miz picks up the US Title belt

Miz says that he did that because he can. Welcome to the Miz show. He says that he is done waiting. He wants the cage lowered for the main event.

Alex Riley versus John Cena in an Escape Only If Riley wins, Cena admits that Miz is awesome but if Cena wins, Riley is fired Cage Match

Winner: John Cena

Evan Bourne vs Sheamus raw 2011.02.28

tant — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 08:10:36 +0000

Bourne with a drop kick into the corner and then he kicks and punches Sheamus. Sheamus throws Bourne down but he misses a clothesline. Bourne with a spin kick and then he goes up top for the shooting star press and he hits it for the three count.

Winner: Evan Bourne

After the match, it is time for the ‘voice of the WWE’ to make his way to the ring and that person is Michael ‘I am to James Franco as Jim Ross is to Billy Crystal’ Cole.

Cole stands in front of Lawler and he has something to say but nobody else can hear him. Cole says that he will tell Lawler,

Evan Bourne vs CM Punk raw 2010.10.11

tant — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 05:20:35 +0000

Bourne with a kick to Punk’s leg and then he hits a leaping knee and Punk goes to the floor. Bourne tries for a rana off the apron but Punk catches him and sends Bourne into the ringside barrier. They return to the ring and Punk gets a near fall. Punk with elbows and he gets a near fall. Punk with a front face lock on Bourne. Bourne blocks a suplex and then he avoids Punk’s running knee into the corner. Bourne with kicks to Punk and then he hits a spinning heel kick. Bourne misses a kick but he connects with a second one. Bourne goes up top for the shooting star press but Punk crotches Bourne and Punk hits Go To Sleep and gets the three count.

Winner: CM Punk

After the match, Punk attacks Bourne and throws him out of the ring. Punk sends Bourne into the ringside barrier twice. Punk drags Bourne and he runs Bourne shoulder first into the ring post. Punk puts Bourne in the Anaconda Vice. The referee tries to get Punk to release the hold and he eventually lets go.

WWE Monday Night RAW 2010.10.11 Results

tant — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 05:16:42 +0000

John Cena comes to the ring and the fans don’t care that he is with Nexus, but he is alone right now. John says that the fans have no idea how much he needs this right now. He says that he wants to make sure that they haven’t lost faith and they still believe. John says that last week, he heard the WWE Universe chant something that he never heard before. He heard them chant “Never Give Up”. Cena says that he has never given up and he will never give up. Cena wants to set the record straight. He made a risk at Hell in a Cell. He had a chance to eliminate Nexus, but he lost the match. Cena says that he made a deal and if he lost, he would become part of Nexus. We see the arm band. Cena says that means he has to take orders from Wade Barrett and if he doesn’t he will be fired. Cena says that he wouldn’t have the opportunity to go to Smackdown, he would be fired from the WWE. Cena says that he has been here a long time and he has heard the people cheer and boo. He loves coming out because the fans are so excited about what they see. Cena says that this isn’t about money or championships because he loves this. Cena says that he doesn’t know what he would do if he wasn’t in WWE. Cena says that he is between a rock and a hard place. As a result, he might do something that people might not want to see him do.

Miz interrupts and he comes to the ring with his lackey Alex Riley and Michael Cole perks up.

Miz mocks Cena for not wanting to lose the support of the WWE Universe. Miz says that he is going to captain Team Raw against Big Show and Team Smackdown at Bragging Rights. Miz says that he won’t assemble his team by judging them personally. Miz offers Cena a spot on his team. Miz says that he knows that Cena supports Raw and he knows that Cena did not like Big Show turning his back on Raw. He wants Cena to join his team.

Cena says that this is a good idea, but he doesn’t like Miz as captain and he says that it is as good as having Betty White doing a spread in Playboy. Cena suggests that he captain Team Raw.

Miz says that he called it first so he gets to be captain.

Wade Barrett comes out and he says that he is going to make this very easy for everyone concerned. Wade says that he doesn’t care about Raw or Smackdown. All he cares about is Nexus and the WWE Title. Wade tells John that he needs his complete undivided attention at Bragging Rights. He wants Cena in his corner while he faces Randy Orton. Wade tells Cena that he doesn’t want anything distracting him.

Cena says that he can do both. Wade tells Cena that he will be in his corner at Bragging Rights. Wade wants to know if Cena is going to disobey his orders.

Alex Riley pipes up and he says that Cena might want to be in Wade’s corner because maybe the Miz will cash in his Money in the Bank Briefcase to win the title.

Miz yells at Alex for ruining the surprise. He says that maybe he will lead Raw to victory and win the title.

Cole’s Electronic Buddy chimes in and Cole has an e-mail. And Cole quotes, Wade, while John Cena answers to him, everyone on the Raw roster ultimately answers to him. He wants Raw to beat Smackdown at Bragging Rights and he wants the best team possible. He has arranged a series of matches with the winners advancing. Cole says that there can only be one true captain and he doesn’t want any betrayal. There will be a match to determine the Captain of Team Raw. The Miz will face John Cena.

Miz likes that because he will beat John Cena tonight. He will be team captain of Raw and maybe he will cash in the briefcase at Bragging Rights and become the WWE Champion. He tells Barrett that he can’t do anything about it.

Barrett hits Miz and Riley joins in as John Cena stands around for a minute until Cena punches Miz and then he gives Riley an Attitude Adjustment.

Barrett and Cena have some words in the center of the ring and Barrett is dressing Cena down.

Ted DiBiase with Maryse versus R Truth with Eve Torres

Winner: R Truth

John Morrison versus Tyson Kidd for Slot Number Four of Seven on Team Raw

Winner: John Morrison

Nexus are in the locker room and David asks Husky and Michael if they will tell them what Barrett promised them. Harris says that he won’t tell him if they are in Nexus. Barrett tells Otunga if anyone wants to know, they ask him. Barrett tells Micahel and Husky to leave.

Barrett wants to know what Otunga was saying last week to Cena. Barrett says that they can get ready for the match at Bragging Rights, they can help him. Otunga says that he will face Orton and can beat him. But he says that Justin Gabriel can beat Orton and the 450 Splash is a dangerous move. Barrett tells Gabriel that he will be facing Randy Orton and Slater and Otunga will be in Gabriel’s corner.

Santino Marella versus Zack Ryder in a Team Raw Qualifying Match

Winner: Santino Marella

Randy Orton is walking in the back and he will be facing Justin Gabriel when we get back from this commercial break.

Justin Gabriel with David Otunga and Heath Slater versus Randy Orton in a Non Title . . . Non Bragging Rights Related Match

Winner: Randy Orton

Sheamus is walking in the back fella as he gets ready for a match against Daniel Bryan.

Daniel Bryan versus Sheamus in a Win and Get on Team Raw Match

Winner: Sheamus

John Cena is in the dressing room and R Truth stops by to say hello and he sits down with John. Truth wants to know what John is doing. He says that John has a reputation as a stand up guy. Truth says that they are buddies and he says that Cena joining Nexus isn’t sitting well with the locker room. Truth wants to know if Cena would take out anyone in the locker room if Barrett tells him to do it. Truth says that if he doesn’t listen to Barrett, he is going to get fired and Cena will have to leave what they love. He tells Cena that there is another way out of this before he makes a mistake. He tells Cena to quit.

ichael Cole talks about what is still coming up. Cole wants to know why Lawler isn’t on the Miz bandwagon.

Evan Bourne versus CM Punk in a We have finished Team Raw’s roster for Bragging Rights Match

Winner: CM Punk

Evan Bourne being helped out of the building.

Natalya is in the ring and she says that for the divas who call themselves Flawless, Laycool is as cheap as the shoes that Layla threw at her. She says that her Uncle Bret told her to stand up for herself. At Bragging Rights, the only thing that LayCool is going to throw is a temper tantrum when they lose the titles.

Michelle and Layla come out and Michelle says that they hate to come out but all they hear is blah blah blah. Michelle says that the WWE Universe would rather look at her. They say that Natalya has more courage than the other divas. She comes out every week knowing that they are in HD. That means that everyone can see her flaws. Layla says that Natalya has inherited her father’s facial hair gene. Layla says that Natalya has to shave herself before every show or she would look like her dad. They say that Natalya would look just like the Anvil.

Natalya congratulates them after last week’s fiasco with the headsets, they proved to be the most annoying divas in the WWE. After tonight’s great experience, they are going to prove that their IQ is less than their waist size.

Michelle and Layla like what Natalya said and don’t realize that they were being insulted.

Layla says that they are the best there is, best there was, and ever will be. Michelle says that all of the divas respect them and love them. Michelle says that they will love her in two weeks.

Michelle and Layla walk with their backs to the TitanTron and the Raw Divas come out and we have a bit of a brawl. Natalya punches Layla and she tries to put her in the Sharpshooter but Michelle pulls Layla out of the ring and they go into the crowd and escape.

John Cena versus Miz with Alex Riley in a No Disqualification Match for the Captain Spot on Team Raw

Winner: Miz

Barrett tells Cena to listen to him. . .

but first, we have mail and Michael Cole climbs his high chair and says that if Michael McGillicutty and Husky Harris want to get involved in matches, they will have an official match. They will be part of a tag team against John Cena and Randy Orton.

Barrett says that is very interesting. Wade says that he wants to add a little spin to things. If Cena loses, Harris and McGillicutty are in Nexus. Barrett says that Cena will do the right thing next week.

Cena stops Barrett from talking and he tells Cena not to do that. Barrett says that Cena would love to drop him right here right now for the WWE Universe. Barrett says that Cena won’t do anything because it has nothing to do with the General Manager. It is because Cena is scared. He calls Cena yellow bellied and a coward. He says that Cena is afraid that he would be embarrassed just like at Hell in a Cell. He says that he can turn his back on Cena. He says that Cena has let down the WWE Universe again. He calls Cena pathetic.

Cena screams and then he cannot summon the power of SuperCena because of the kryptonite that is Nexus.

Barrett says that he has left everyone down again and he calls Cena a total and utter disgrace.

Cena walks away and Barrett orders him to stop. He tells John that until next week, ‘You Can’t See Me’.

WWE Monday Night RAW 2010.10.04 Results

tant — Tue, 05 Oct 2010 15:52:16 +0000

Nexus walking to the ring and they appear to be missing someone. Wade takes the mic and he says that since they are in the ring, it means he beat John Cena last night. Before they bring out the newest member of the Nexus, there are a few issues he would like to address. First, he has identified the mystery assailants from last night. We go to the TitanTron and we find out that it was Michael McGillicutty and Husky Harris. Wade says that he did not ask either man to help him and they are not part of the Nexus. Wade says that his second issue is that since he needed no help to beat John Cena, why did the rest of the men in black shirts with yellow backgrounds come to the ring to almost cost him his match. He blames Otunga for that but it is about celebrating and inducting the newest member of the Nexus. Wade introduces the newest person to put on the Black and Gold as John Cena makes his way to the ring.

John forgot the meeting in orientation about the proper Nexus dress code.

Wade tells John that he knows it is tearing him apart inside, but he knows that John is a man of his word. John said that if he lost, he would become a full fledged member of Nexus. Wade tells John that he will find out that this is the best thing to happen to him.

Michael Tarver tells Cena that he put his hands on him and made jokes about him. He also threatened his livelihood. Tarver says that the joke is on him now. Tarver says that Cena failed. Tarver apologizes to Wade. Tarver says that they have a gift for him. He gives Cena the N arm band. Cena removes one of his CeNation arm bands and replaces it with the N Band.

Heath tells John that they know the transition will be difficult but they are here for them. Heath says that everyone wants to know his thoughts about all of this, instead of making him feel uncomfortable, they have written a few things for Cena to say.

Wade tells Cena that this is non-negotiable and that he will read it and he will read it now.

John says that I John Cena officially acknowledge that I am officially a member of the Nexus. Any enemy of the Nexus is now an enemy of mine. As for my fans, I hope you stand by me because the fact of the matter is that you are Nexus or Against Us.

Wade says that things will get easier. He tells Cena that he will have his first match as part of Nexus and it will be a tag match against Evan Bourne and Mark Henry. Wade says that he will let Cena choose his tag partner.

Cena walks to Tarver and he smiles in his face and points at Tarver. Wade says that it is official. Wade tells them to come out right now to receive the beating of their lives.

We see footage from last week when Bourne and Henry lost to Nexus in a tag match.

John Cena and Michael Tarver versus Evan Bourne and Mark Henry

Winners: Evan Bourne and Mark Henry

Michael Cole quotes: The terms of the stipulation for his match with Wade Barrett that if he lost, he must join the Nexus. Nexus is clearly a group that takes direction from its leader Wade Barrett. As a member of the group, he must take direction from Wade Barrett. If he does not, as much as I would hate to do it. As much as it is bad for business. As much as the WWE Universe would despise it, I would have no alternative . . . but to terminate your WWE Contract. No one man, despite his popularity is bigger than the WWE. In other words, I will fire you.

Cena thinks about it in the ring for a little while before he exits the ring.

Natalya versus Alicia Fox

Winner: Natalya

Johnny Knoxville is with Gail Kim and Melina as they steal the Bella’s job. They give Johnny a high five. Zack Ryder is in the back and he comes over to Johnny and gets a ‘special’ high five.

John Cena is pacing in the hallway and Josh asks John how he is going to deal with the edict of the General Messenger. John says that this is all he has ever done and this is all that he has. Cena says that he can’t not be in the WWE. Cena runs into the dressing room because he sees Michael McGillicutty and Husky Harris in the hall. Wade says that he saw what John did to Tarver and he needs to talk. We see Husky and McGillicutty leave the dressing room as we go to commercial.

We are back and people in the band who gave us the theme from Hell in a Cell is in the crowd.

We go to the ring where the United States Champion is already in the ring for his match.

Daniel Bryan versus Sheamus in a Non Title Match

Winner: Daniel Bryan by Disqualification

Michael Cole cannot describe what we have seen so far. Cole is trying to figure out how Raw will continue with John Cena in Nexus.

Michael Cole is in the ring with the General Messenger 2010. He wants to make it clear that he will no longer be communicating with his voice altered. He will communicate via e-mail through the voice of the WWE, Michael Cole. Before we go further, let’s see what happened last week between Edge and the General Messenger.

Cole says that on behalf of the General Manager that act of defiance is unacceptable. Two things will happen. First, Edge will come out and apologize. Then he will make a huge announcement about the WWE Title. Cole tells Edge that the General Manager is waiting.

Edge says that he is not going to apologize for anything. In case you missed Smackdown or Hell in a Cell, Edge reminds us that he is on a personal campaign against stupid. A GM who communicates by e-mails is stupid. Edge says that Cole has been the epitome of stupid since 1997. He says that he would rather listen to a recording of Jim Ross. Edge says that when he becomes the WWE Champion, you will see some attitude.

And Cole quotes. Tonight we are going to determine the number one contender for the WWE Title. It will be in a 20 man battle royal. The winner gets to face Randy Orton at Bragging Rights. The General Messenger tells Edge that he has disrespected him one too many times so he won’t be in the battle royal, because Edge has been traded to Smackdown.

The fans want Edge to spear the GM. Edge says this is one of the greatest nights of his life. Now he doesn’t have to deal with the general manager and the worst catchphrase . . . ‘And I Quote’.

Cole says that since he is the official voice of the WWE, he wants Edge to show him some respect.

Edge asks if it is respectful if he went off Raw on a high note by spearing him off his perch.

Before Edge can do anything, Michael Cole’s mancrush and manservant come out and Miz says that Edge will do no such thing. He calls Cole a visionary because he saw Miz’s awesomeness before anyone else. Miz tells Cole to go to his announce desk. Edge tells the Edge wannabe to do it.

One word name . . . check. Coming to the ring in a trenchcoat . . . check. Winning Money in the Bank . . . check. Edge says that he used Awesome while Miz was popping zits in high school.

Miz says that they are nothing alike. Edge says that he has been WWE Champion. Edge says that he has been married, divorced, and had a live celebration. Edge tells Miz that he hasn’t seen Miz successful with a woman.

Riley says that Miz is the future of the WWE. He says that the Miz is awesome.

Edge says that Miz is awesome at tapping out to Daniel Bryan.

Miz says that either he will be winning the WWE Title at Bragging Rights or he will be leading Team Raw against Team Smackdown.

Edge wants to clarify something and he calls Miz the WWE’s biggest jackass. Edge punches Riley and then he sends Miz into the general manager. Edge waits for Riley to get up and he spears Riley. Miz with the Skull Crushing Finale to Edge.

Miz pulls Riley out of the ring and helps him to the back.

Cena is in the dressing room and he says that what Cena did to Tarver might have been clever, but he has been looking to get rid of Tarver for a while. Wade tells Cena that he needs to help him win the battle royal tonight. Cena wants to know what will happen if Cena wins. Otunga tells Cena that if Barrett doesn’t win, then he will help one of them win the battle royal. Barrett wants to make sure he heard Otunga clearly and Otunga stammers.

Barrett tells Cena that he will help him or he will be fired.

The Bellas versus Michelle McCool and Layla

Winners: The Bella Twins

Maryse is in the back with Johnny Knoxville. She says that she knows that Johnny has been sending the letters. Ted says that he knows it was Johnny. Ted walks into a high five. Maryse says that Johnny is dead and she throws her shoes at Johnny. Maryse freak out and then she get hit from behind by giant hand and fall on Ted. Johnny runs away as Cole calls this a trainwreck.

Cole and Lawler talk about Jackass 3D and we see a clip.

Johnny Knoxville comes to the ring and he says hello to the fans he is glad to be back on Raw. He talks about his new movie. Johnny tries to leave the ring before the Auto Tune Million Dollar Son to come to the ring and he is accompanied by Maryse.

Johnny apologizes to Ted. Ted asks Johnny if he knows who he is and what he can do. Johnny says that he tried to make Maryse laugh. Johnny asks Ted if he made her laugh the first time without his pants. Ted slaps Johnny and puts him in the Million Dollar Dream.

We see on the TitanTron ‘Now You Are Mine’. Goldust appears behind Ted and he gives Ted the Final Cut. Goldust says that he doesn’t want Ted, he doesn’t want Maryse either. Goldust wants the Million Dollar Belt.

it is almost time for the twenty man battle royal to determine the number one contender.

First, we see the Make a Wish video package.

Cole mentions the trade involving Edge and the Cenafication of Nexus. We have some footage from earlier tonight.

Cena is still looking at his Nexus arm band and David Otunga comes over. He says that he knows that John is upset, but Nexus isn’t all bad. He says that Barrett can be a bit demanding, but he knows that they can make this work. David says that this isn’t the end. David tells John that if he ever wants to talk, he is there for him.

Cole says that there is someone else who will not be in this battle royal in addition to Edge. We go back to what Randy Orton did to Chris Jericho.

Twenty Man Battle Royal featuring John Morrison, R Truth, Santino Marella, Vladimir Kozlov, Sheamus, John Cena, Heath Slater, Wade Barrett, David Otunga, Justin Gabriel, David Hart Smith, Tyson Kidd, Darren Young, Zack Ryder, Miz, William Regal, Ted DiBiase, Mark Henry, Primo

Winner: Wade Barrett

John Cena and Michael Tarver vs Evan Bourne and Mark Henry raw 2010.10.04

tant — Tue, 05 Oct 2010 15:36:46 +0000

Cena and Bourne start things off and he offers his hand to Bourne and Evan doesn’t know what to do. Bourne shakes his hand and Tarver yells at Cena for showing sportsmanship. Cena tags Tarver in to see the Nexus way. Tarver has something to say to Bourne and Tarver with a knee and forearm to the back. We go to commercial.

We are back and Mark Henry works over Michael Tarver while we see Cena on the apron. Henry works on the arm and Henry kicks Tarver. Henry kicks Tarver and then Bourne tags in and he hits a kick from the turnbuckles onto the arm for a near fall. Cena reaches for the tag and he doesn’t seem to have his heart in it. Bourne with a snap mare and kick to the back. Henry tags back in and Henry lets Tarver get to his corner but Cena turns his back on Tarver as Henry hits Tarver from behind. Henry with a front face lock that may be a choke. Tarver punches Henry but Henry with a double sledge to the back. Henry walks across Tarver’s chest and then he tags Bourne back in. Henry with a slam and Bourne with a standing moonsault for a near fall.

Bourne with a wrist lock but Tarver punches Bourne but Bourne with a kick. Tarver with an Irish whip and he runs into a boot. Tarver with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex and both men are down. Tarver goes for the tag but Cena gets something out of his pocket and he signs some autographs during the match.

Tarver yells at Cena and Henry tags back in and he hits the World’s Strongest Slam for the three count.

Winners: Evan Bourne and Mark Henry

After the match, Cena takes the mic and he says that he appreciates Nexus writing a note on his behalf, but he would like to make a statement of his own. He says that as the newest member of Nexus, he plans on doing one thing as a member of the group. Destroying it from within. Cena says that he proves that you can be Nexus and Against Us. Cena hits Tarver in the head with the mic and then he waits for Tarver to get up and Cena with a running clothesline. Cena rearranges the ring steps and then he looks at his Nexus arm band. Cena picks up Tarver and he slams Tarver on the ring steps. Cena picks up Tarver because the fans ask for it and he slams Tarver on the steps one more time. Cena sends Tarver back into the ring. Cena dives for the knee and he puts Tarver in the STF. Tarver miraculously does not tap because there is no match . . . until the General Messenger makes his presence known.

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